Siamese Twins

It happened during recess this morning. I was playing a rough game of elimination where we used a dodge ball and threw it at one another. Those hit, would be considered out. My foot missed a step and I fell on the hard concrete. It felt like a prick, but now stung like acid. And just look at that cut. Scowl.

You were hanging around the monkey bars when it happened. Running through the hallways we went to the nurse's office for a dab of iodine and watched her carefully wipe of the access yellow puss oozing endlessly with every swab of the cotton ball.

Nurses' office are always cool.

We are like siamese twins now. The scraped knee even makes you wilt a little when you run.

One autumn, right around the first week of school, you seemed a little off color. You tell me you have been feeling sick for a while. Your fever is getting worse. I think you should go to the nurse's office and spend the day in sick bay. It's not manly, you defend. It is easily curable, even if I treat it on its own. Owh, I say.

We used to think going to the nurses office was so much fun.

We are still like siamese twins now.

Each going in the exact opposite direction.

Si je vous laissais

Ne me quitte pas - nina simone. I love this song featured in Muhksin.

Gc once said that we enjoy songs performed by the opposite sex. I believe that it is somewhat true. I love incubus. Wish it was me 'he' was missing in I Miss You. Or I could say I love Jason Mraz, and does 'he' think of me, and immediately relate me to the stars, like in Bella Luna?

"Mystery the moon, A hole in the sky,
The cosmic fish, they love to kiss
They're giving birth to constalations..

You are an illuminating anchor,
I'm just a singer, You're the world,
All I can bring you,
Is this language of a Lover.."

And of course, it lead me to invision, if I was to leave him one day, would he wait for me right there and stayed to watch me smile, and dance? The promise of pearls of rain when there is no rain to be found? Such were the words sung by nina simone. But then, she's a she.

All this mental debate and euphoric high from my hormones made me ask myself, am I that sadistic? Like some sort of depressed sick puppy? To want him to feel the pain of losing me when surely, I am standing here, still? Psycho. To want to feel like I am placed on a pedestal. To be praised after. To feel adored forever? I mean, really. If bandon boyd, and jason can.. does it mean that you can too, love?

The other night me and some girlfriends were in the car listening to Mahakarya Cinta by faizal. The sort of high I get is not from his voice, but more from the things he says about how great his love is for the woman in his life. It always makes me feel and wish that 'he' would feel that way towards me.

I am a dreamer. By not connecting to what I say is a definite possibility. I am a dreamer.

là où l'amour sera roi,
là où l'amour sera loi..
et vous êtes mon prince

Petronas Interview

Petronas Interview!!! Its pretty much the interview of the century for us petronas scholars, taking aside the other mother of all interviews, like the one with schlumberger et all. I was in the first batch of names, so I consider it to be lucky to get it overwith a.s.a.p! My slot was supposed to be from 11-12pm friday, but those from the wednesday and thursday session complained of how late things got, I decided to sleep in and arrive at the interview venue about 2 hours later than the suggested assembly time of 8 am. So nice lah, my bantal busuk. Haha.

I got there late, so I missed my friends from the 8 and 9 am slots. There were only these 3 girls left to accompany me. Sab, anith and emma. Everyone looked so nice decked out in propper suits and so smart and pretty! Ha ha. As expected, I was the only one to be hyped since I was pretty fresh out of bed where else the rest had been waiting for like, 3 hours or so. Poor things.

The 11 am slot were all mechanical students, this is firdaus and omar and mkok in the back.

These girls left for the 10 am slot..so I had all the boys to myself after that. Haha. This was in the waiting room, the next room to go to was the preparation room, where they gave us a case study which will be elaborated and discussed with the examiner/interviewer in the interview room. They gave us about 30 minutes to prepare any notes or gather our thoughts =)

Matle..being summoned to go into the preparation room. Our portfolios, forms and cvs were handed in and sorted by this personnel. Very efficient if I must say. The waiting room, preparation rooms were bloody cold. Sebek g lamat, klo tak da frostbite da aku nih. I think I have a circulation problem, my toes and fingers freeze up real quick.

Dan ku katakan pada Cinod, "Ape nak ckp klo die tanye psl Oil Price ek??"

And much to my disbelief, or well that was kind of strong. Much to my - ye la disbelief!! I got the Oil topic for my case study. I think I did ok. The role play was a bit tiring on me mentally. All the sudden I'm the manager of a factory and I felt like I've been repeating the same excuses again and again. Haha. Sohri la Encik Ahmad from Carigali, I might not make the cut for a manager just yet, perhaps in 5 years time? Ngahaha..All in all, syukur, alhamdulillah.. It's so bloody over!!!

Done with my session, time for some silly photography taking. Oh happy, happy =)

GOOD LUCK to those being interviewed in the upcoming sessions!! My advice, don't get too worked up over the case study, better be prepared with strategies for the role play, tough cookie, that one!

Smile With Me

Hey, you.
Keep your chin up.
Come tickle me from within.

We're both in helpless doubt,
why don't you start with a grin?

So yeah, baby,
smile with me.

'Cause everything's gonna be more,
more than a dream.

***
And to think I need you most at times like this, is way too selfish of me to ask.

Lisa's Tee

I made this for lisa's 23rd birthday which fell on the 16th of march. Speaking of which.. Happy birthday to my dearest Mama =) I didn't get you anything this year, even if I did it would be delayed due to the distance. Last year I got you a wallet..this year I'll try to get a job as a present for both you and ayah, how's that sound? Ambitious aye.

Happy birthday, march babies!! Let's try to live it up to the fullest cause for all we know, april is getting mighty closer than we thought! And I hate suprises.

I have a Petronas ability test later and an interview session on Friday. Yikes.

The Roses Will Cry With You

In the morning, you pass by a bed of roses. You think you hear them call out to you. Faint. You are definite that they are calling out to you. It sounds like people crying.

"This is insane," you utter under your breath.

The flowers weep after you. They know your secret. Everyday you carry it around like a foetus in a womb, getting bigger and bigger as the day passes. You weep in your heart and force yourself to swallow the pain.

"Pain is good for me, it will make me stronger for tomorrow," you chant.

But unlike an expecting mother, you'd rather it not see the sunlight of day. It is better kept this way, you agreed. Everyone around you tells you,

"We understand exactly how you feel..."

And with all your heart you wish to tell them, "Right, I feel like sodding it up your ass and see how you understand it". Instead, you pretend to be touched. It is easier that way, too. Exhausted from all the fake things in a relationship, you feel like you are falling out of love. Or is just being out of love?

When the day ends, you walk back to the coldness of your own solitude.

And this time, you hear the roses. Distinct.

And this time, they weep out to you in plus forte.

Only Worldy Delights

February has past me by, but the remains has left me a myriad of colors and a much more wonderfully vibrant feeling within. The scent of spring sprays gently in the wind as we pass each day..

To all my dear friends whom I could not have learned without. Its only march but I am already preparing myself to miss you guys. Sob.

Thank You, for this blessed life. Thank you, for your neverending love, love.

The BBQ

Kak Anna played host to the BBQ party she held , which some of us attended and others could not make due to the location and timing, and etc.. We were invited to come at 830, tp as expected no one made it there that early. Nevertheless, a small group of 8 people showed up (I should've just buat muke tak malu and brought my brothers along isk isk) then there would at least be 10 of us to eat all the yummy food up.

Oh ini sudah gambar sesi menapau, kak anna prepared baked macaroni, mashed potatoes, garden salad, steamed veggies, fruit salad, garlic bread ( I helped yg ni), mushroom soup, nasi goreng, bbq chicken and beef, as well as my favourite corn on the cob. Banyak takk? Yea well, in the end all the plates were cleared and everyone left carrying a goodie bag which consisted of tommorow's breakfast. Haha. Thanks kak anna!

The dunia blogku people ---> as, hanis, iza, wani, on the floor is as's sister (her fiance's sister actually) kak anna yg superb comel and me yg sudah comot. Hehe. Not in the picture is Abg adi (kak anna's husband yg responsible for the bbq-ing) rahz (hanis's husband) and as's fiance.

We spent talking about things in random and then went on to more specifics like the blogging world, the SMART project (haha) and then some more on babies, and cooking.. it was all polite talk. Which is nice, but I felt a bit quiet. First time pon kan. It gets better, I'm sure. Thanks to kak anna & abg adi for your kind hospitality and warm welcome, we should meet up sometimes in the future, this time with irdina awake and kicking =)

And To Think You Know Marilyn

Once I know the what, I will starve for the when, the how and then I just might go all out to fathom the why. I need to know the why. I must know the why.

Humans are like that, fulfilling our curiosity at anyone else's expenses. Those 3Ws and a H was so bloody charming when we were in school, those alphabets held the answer to writing a well prepared composition.

Right now, its getting me nowhere pretty. Or at least, well composed for that matter.

Clean Dressings

Everyone is wounded. We were born with wounds, stenciled on to our body or we either scratch and tear easy. And you tore me the most. We are constantly hurting one another, to seek confirmation, to test our existence, to find out just how much does he love me?

Our wounds come in different shapes and sizes, we treat them differently. You're wounded too, look at how you cover it up everyday in the morning, you wake up and fake a smile. You put on a big bandage, and walk out to a brand new day. You wish. The more lies you tell yourself the deeper the wound gets, until the skin is rotten and loses hope of healing.

But I said I'd help you heal. Now I find it tiring. It drains me and makes me wonder why I didn't notice the wounds before. I left you, and started to look for someone with smaller wounds, he should be easier to look after.

I wouldn't be happy, because eventually, the smaller wound on his body will grow, I will get tired of treating it just like I did you and I am thrown back to the point where I started to judge people, based on their wounds.

Lemme be your seatbelt

This test result does not potray me exactly in life, but as a result of a test, and I think its something fun to share =)

Find your own pose!

Seatbelt Traits and Tendencies

After a long night of The Seatbelt pose (and Seatbelts do sleep close to ten hours a night, quite a bit longer than the typical seven and a half), couples wake feeling warm, safe, and uniquely free of doubt. Regular doses of the pose can elevate Seatbelters to a new level of personal confidence, which buoys them to great heights in love and at the gym and can lead to plum promotions and camera time.

Comfort Zone

The Seatbelt pose is in the Sun Sleeper family. Related Sun poses to try: The Heimlich and Classic Spoons.

Health Note

For some couples (about one in every fifteen), extended periods of The Seatbelt's patented "coziness" can lead to feelings of drugged complacency. If this happens to you, try switching to the Flying Bobs pose for as many nights as it takes to get the blood flowing again.

***

The Couples EDITION

I did this myself, had a few friends do this and matched them up with their boyfriends or girlfriends. None of it is proven to be true, its just for fun =)

These two poses are from the same family The Sea Sleepers Family, so to dearest mister N and miss M, I think its all good =)

The Excalibur is from the Wind pose Family, mmg suke belit2..and The Seatbelt is from the Sun Sleepers Family; those who love to sleep up to 10 hours a day. Goodluck ye.

The Colon is from the Sea Sleeper Family while the Toboggan is from the Sun Sleeper family. If you move the girl from the Colon pose and put her where she is in the Toboggan pose, then I think it makes sense.

*note: I am purely fabricating my own justifications, don't take me literally, other than the good luck wishes, I have no clue what sleeping poses are about. Haha.Happy Saturday!

Party Pix

I'm just going to let the pictures do the story-telling today, its all jengga, yatt (yes the girl in the Taska Yumie picture) sara, gc and me. The theme was orange-sorta-purple sorbet. Haha. Ape aku merepek nih. Enjoy.

Extra cheese, or it won't go gooey like that.

This is the complimentary Birthday Pizza, all you need to do to get one is go like this "Its my birthday today" before the waiter can digest anything else and he'd leave you without bugging for an ID card or such.

Mr. Boyfriend. Eh, silap. Gigi cantek =D

I like to play hostess, so at St*baks, just lemme bancur2 ape2 patot and then we all can sip it nicely, k. Don't know if its just me or what, whenever I go to St*baks or the coffee bean, the orders always come out all weird. Either the wrong size, or they give me things in ice blend when I want it hot..etc etc.. Sila check beberapa kali sebelum membuat bayaran ye. And don't say 'yes' to anything extra yg barista tu dok offer.

Sekali sekala, lemme be the gedik one la boleh.

Orange tasting people. Yummyy.

And final gedik pose before the strike of midnight... Thank you dear friends, thanks for making the bloody 23rd memorable *sobb*