Feeling Low

Jengga tanye. Dan ini jawapan ku. This is outside warehouse 29, my place of work. I work 6 days a week. One day entitled for rest. I sleep through the whole day. This preschool is getting a bit tiring for me. I enjoy the work, maintenance, learning lots of new systems and all mechanical stuff. But I have never been this low in my whole life. I have not yet been offshore.

The staff house is empty. I live there alone. I have no one to talk to. Its been like this for a week now.

I was supposed to do my review on nitrogen units today. But my boss suddenly left for KL for the rest of the week. Pretty sucky huh? So lamat lagi lah aku dpt appraisal. Mmg taik.

Tolong la cepat2 anta aku g oman. There is no future for female engineers in this company in this location. Bla bla bla..

Jauh Mimpiku

Jauh Mimpiku

Pernah kusimpan jauh rasa ini
Berdua jalani certa
Kau ciptakan mimpiku
Jujurku hanya sesalkan diriku

Kau ciptakan mimpiku
tapi ku hanya sesalkan diriku

Ku harus lepaskanmu
Melupakan senyummu
Semua tentangmu tentangku hanya harap
Jauh ku jauh mimpiku dengan inginku

- peterpan, alexandria

Kuala Belait

On 28th October I left for Brunei with Nicholas Moses. We had to go for our lab session there. Unfortunately the lab session was cut short since the lab techy had to go offshore. We stayed in the Swiss Apartment Hotel, Kuala Belait.

Kuala Belait apparently was at the end tip of Brunei, relatively from Bandar Seri Begawan. After landing at the airport, I immediately dozed off only to constantly find myself to wake up and see the same straight road ahead. Kinda like a bad dream. It turned out to be that the highway there does only consist of this one main road which lead from one part of the country to another.

Once we arrived in Kuala Belait, I realized that it took us about 4 hours from the airport to where we were headed!!

The place was kinda quiet. Most of the shops closed at 8pm. Nick and I ended eating at the same place for lunch and dinner. This cute western eatery which served really good food. I bet everyone thought we were there on holiday. Haha.

I'm bored. Obviously. Waiting is a painfully agonizing part of living.

Beam me up scotty, please.

plain stupid

he called today. the transmission was kind of rough. i could still tell it was him. he gave me a number to call. call me if you want to he said.

he must be just as crazy as i am.

i tried to call, but the number was too long. i kept getting the stupid lady who tells us that the number doesnt exist in the local system anymore. wtf.

i called people of knowledge. 103 they all said. telekom. where are you calling maam? i got through to ship to shores, which lead to an invalid 1-800 number. i called 103 again. more sarcasm from the operator. what was her problem?

i travelled the world with the house phone tonight. everwhere but there baby.

he called again.

wrong number luv, take this one. its a bit longer but i can try if you want. if i want. he has no clue how i am not holding up here.

before i broke down into unforgiveable tears, i travelled to the labuan port. ship offices in KL. you name it. half of his friends. stupid satellite phones.

he called for the last time.

its ok baby, i'll ask around how it really works. dont worry too much. hope you are doing fine. you have no idea.

i still have 2 slides to prepare for my stupid mentor.

stupid.stupid.

Where is my Root Radical

Oh what a stupid title. I miss my root radical. Whatever you may be. A serum. An antidote. Just gimme more.

I am having a really rough couple of days.

They cancelled my transfer to Duri, Indonesia and decided to put me in Oman. Godknowswhere la kan in the dessert.

My mentor is driving me nuts. Mama leaves for yemen on the 22nd. I am afraid I might not make it in time to see her. Shit.

***

Tunggu aku dengan senyum mu itu.