The-not so current- P situation

I work in a world where the ratio of women to men would be 1:25, there are only 3 female engineers, and another 90 of male. Ok maybe my ratio is kinda off. Who cares.

Straight after marriage, we both knew that we were going to go ahead and try for a baby. It wasn't something agreed upon. Instead, I've had it instilled into my brain that we shouldn't plan for these things, for fear that we are actually rejecting or declining what The Almighty is offering.

But deep down inside, I knew I was not planning on having a child before I did my 3-year project cum promotion that is something pretty major. It invovles a revenue oriented project presentation, dissertation paper, a series of 7 interviews with each department (finance, ethics, management, personnel..etc) for a duration of 2 hours each. In a nutshell, its just as bad as a final year thesis this one.

Numerous talks between F and I resulting in getting his consent on not trying for a baby, but did not mean that we were on the pill, or anything like that. We just went for it. Like two crazy kids having fun rolling on pot.

I've felt so pressured lately. I can't seem to be happy if it was true I have conceived. And I don't seem to care much about it either if it did happen.

Haha..I just had to keep this for the record. We love each other still. No matter what. I hope.

Saddles

I'd frame this in a heartbeat.

Thanks J!

Hey Mika!

Bila dah lama sangat bawak kereta macam Mika, mula la aku akan compare semua kereta lain dengan dia. Handling, cornering, acceleration..semua lah. Semua kecuali timing. Kesian kereta hitam aku yang lagi satu ni.

Yang penting, aku kini tidak perlu mengharungi perjalanan 30 minit dari rumah ke ofis dalam keadaan risau dan lenguh kaki dek pijak clutch exidy yang bapok la keras.

Bye Mika, I will definitely miss you.

It all feels the same

I woke up this morning bright and early and decided to treat myself to a breakfast in bed with my PJs on and without the need to brush my teeth. Lovely morning surprise to receive a phone call from F!! The waves have been high and mighty in the east coast of Malaysia, and his little crew boat had to make a U-turn for fear of perishing at sea.

Basically it just means another weekend without him. I still get the same queries from the guys I just met in the base. Where F is and how we are going to make our paths cross if we both play out at sea. I had a cold pear all to myself, and a tall mug of oatmeal and anlene mix. I am getting old.

I did a 30 minute track training this evening. On my last 20 sec leg I sprinted pass a wee school boy of mere 8 years of age, and in passing him I teased him to keep on going. Eventually we sprinted my last leg together, and of course the kid beat me. I had a good run.

Mama will be leaving early Monday morning. I can't wait to go home, sleep with my mom by my side. See, nothing much has changed.